I have been an inactive blogger as of late, due to... life (and death.)
Thank you to all of my friends who prayed for my friend, Aaron, who just last week passed away due to cancer. We were blessed with 3 more years than the doctors gave him. He even had his "expiration date" tattooed on the back of his neck. His theme, "life is good, cancer sucks, choose joy" spread to thousands of people through his FaceBook page and his blogs. His attitude was inspiring, because it was real and true. He shared his journey with all of us.
I met Aaron in Springfield; I can't remember if it was at school or at church. Either way, we became fast friends, sharing similar passions for theater, comedy, and God. I'm proud to say he had a huge crush on me. This is not my vanity speaking, it speaks more to my admiration of his good taste. As luck would have it, he was younger than I, so we never dated. Instead, we had a blast being friends at youth group, backstage, and jumping speed bumps in my little Mazda.
We lost touch after school, as most people do. My family finally convinced me to join FaceBook, where I not only became reacquainted with my high school buddy, but also his wife, Kristin, who had been in my middle school sunday school class that I taught. It took only a short time to reconcile my knowledge of them as individuals into a married couple. That year they stopped by our family Christmas gathering. They had only been married a couple years, and i was thrilled to see how much they loved each other.
Only a month after that reunion did Aaron discover he had advanced colon cancer. It had already moved to some of his other organs. That's when he was given 6 months to live...
And boy did he live! Although he is about my age, he had just "restarted" his life when he married kristin, so (like most newly-weds) they were broke. But Aaron did more in those 3+ years than most people do in their "long" lives. He also reached the status of a local celebrity, due to his attitude towards life and death and cancer and joy. Only a short time after being diagnosed, he won a stand-up comedy event and was crowned "funniest man in eugene/ sprinfield." He even sold ad space on his urn to help leave his wife with less debt. That one got him international recognition. I bought an ad for my "aunt nonnie" books and merchandise. PETA purchased big ads; my favorite is an anti KFC ad that says, "i've kicked the bucket, have you?"
A mutual friend owns Cry Baby Ink. He not only bought ads, but he covered aaron and kristin to their hearts content with awesome tats. Inspired by Aaron, and knowing Greg would do a good job, I also got a "choose joy" tat with a comedy mask overlapping the tragedy mask. I designed it and Greg inked it on. ( Let me just interject here, for those of you who wimp out because of any "pain" involved in tattooing, you're a weenie!) I was thrilled. but when i went to pay, Greg wouldn't let me... because it was for Aaron. I surprised Aaron and Kristin at dinner that night with it. What a wonderful time! *cry baby ink is in the valley river mall in eugene and greg rocks!
Aaron's memorial was a week ago. but I didn't cry until tonight. It was a good, cleansing release. Now I'm ready to move on and look forward to seeing Aaron and our friend, Mark, in heaven, making me giggle and snort for eternity. For now, i miss my joker, my adviser, my friend. Life is better for having known Aaron, and I thank God for the time I had with him.
At one point towards the end, Aaron wrote that he felt as if he were living to die. His death had a name and was an omnipresent burden, but aren't we all living to die? I say this not to be morbid; instead, treat today as if it were on borrowed time. Is it worth those precious minutes wasted on bickering or gossip? Hug your dad as if it was the last time, skip mowing the lawn and go bug-hunting with your son, tell those around you how much you love them. And remember to choose joy!
love, -jay-
ps... please pray for tom's family. his parents desperately need to move into the manor, especial his mom, but his father keeps throwing up road blocks. if things don't happen as they should by the end of this month, it will be an ugly situation. tom and his bother are meeting with their parents tomorrow afternoon (unless his dad can weasel out of it.) please pray for tom and his brother, rick... this has taken a toll on them. mostly pray that ron (the dad) will do the RIGHT thing. thank you!
